Letters

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Posted December 31, 2008 in News

Good Riddance

Your Year in Review issue [vol. 3, iss. 38] was very entertaining, and I especially liked David Silva’s rants about all the heinous hooey that happened in the IE in 2008 (only in the IE, baby!). But, dudes, no mention of Travis Barker’s plane crash? The man is an IE icon and nearly lost his life. I know it didn’t happen out here, but still—an arts and entertainment magazine should mention when an arts and entertainment personality from the area is nearly killed. Was it not a highlight/lowlight, at least on par with Andy Dick’s titty-groping escapades? BTW, thanks for running the Andy Dick picture again, though. What’s that, eleven times?

–Arnis Scharnis, San Bernardino

 

Arnis,

We are a liberal publication, but we aren’t that liberal. As in, we don’t consider Travis Barker art, and his entertainment value is the equivalent of, say, Ringling Bros. Andy Dick, on the other hand, is like something off the brushes of René Magritte. He is enigmatic, virile, handsome, and he’s also prone to sporadic fits of lispy diatribes that just get you in the gut, you know? 

 

Riverside Five-O

Cops charging proprietors to answer disturbance calls is a f*cking joke [vol. 3, iss. 38, “Collect Call Cops”]! Am I wrong or is it their sworn duty to protect and to serve? Who knew those vows were conditional? If the police department wants to charge for repeat visits to troubled nightspots then expect them to charge for anything they deem “irresponsible” as time goes on. What about when they exploit trailer park trash in that goddamn television show, Cops?  Think they charged them for the visit? I hate Riverside cops! Peace.

–Thai Tony, Riverside

 

Thai Tony,

You see what they’re doing to us, don’t you? They are playing us off each other! By charging for repeat visits to nightspots they know we will talk about it, and they know you’ll get pissy—if you keep harping like this, then the Riverside Police Department has already won.

 

A Steady Stream

You guys are the douchiest of douches, you know that? I wouldn’t wrap my fish in your rag. I wouldn’t line a bird cage with it. In other words, your [sic] useless and I wish you’d just go away. 

–Kenny, Parts Unknown

 

Happy New Year to you too, Ken Calvert!

 

Braxton Leeds

Is Braxton Leeds English? It seems like an English name, and he writes like a snobby Brit. Who talks about haddock in a casual way unless he’s from GB?

–A fellow Portsmouth transplant

 

Are you off your bloody trolly or something? No, he’s not British, but he does run like Benny Hill.


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