After manhandling a rude child during last week’s disastrous attempt as a clown, the reality diva headed to the sports-themed eatery to redeem herself; washing (badly) 150 potatoes, whining, feebly assembly a Monster Burger Combo, complaining, burning her finger on the grill and whining and complaining some more.
Had you thought a famous star like New York would draw huge crowd here in the IE, well, that would have been a bet badly made, my friend. The reality of this reality show was that Archibald’s on June 17 was filled with a typical lunch crowd that came and left with their orders largely without missing the proverbial beat, or blinking the proverbial eye, and the only eager onlookers were children—a cruel irony considering New York vowed not to spawn after her recent stint as Bozo.
A sign was posted outside the restaurant’s window, trumpeting the filming of the episode—but like the oft-quoted tree in the forest, no one was there to pay attention, so the day went without droves of fans, mobs of curiosity-seekers or packs of VH1-addicted stalkerazzi.
Notwithstanding, New York’s loud and chalkboard screeching laugh echoed all over the restaurant as she cheered herself on—“I’m doing great!”—as she completed each of her want-fries-with-that transactions.
As New York served people at the front counter, the ever ditsy star made every small task seem impossible. Her overacting was commendable. Sort of. She dropped change all over the counter. In the middle of one transaction, New York randomly started grooming herself saying, “I got to get beautified. I can’t be taking orders all ashy. I need some lotion!”
In the end, New York failed in all her tasks—and failed to entertain. New York, hold the cheese.