For some women, it’s sex. For others, Godiva chocolate and Christian Louboutin pumps. Then there are women like me: We want it all, and we want it for half off.
We shop at T.J. Maxx, Marshall’s and Ross, and it’s not uncommon to see us completely, unapologetically rolling out of the discount retailers with bags filled to the brim. Our take could include anything from a satin bustier with matching garters and a wetsuit, to artisan chocolates, plant holders, candles and an iPod docking station, to sassy, 3-inch cherry red platforms and a sensible winter coat.
Shopping the discount stores is not for wussies. Do not expect good customer service. Do not assume that the match to the size 11 purple-and-yellow Nike hi-tops that would look so good on your man will be easily located. You must be willing to suffer for style. Don’t even bother writing anything down, or even mentally composing a list of things to watch for. No, shopping at a discount couldn’t even be called a scavenger hunt. It’s a crapshoot.
The competition can get fierce in there. And don’t let the little church ladies fool you. Sundays are cutthroat if you’re looking for a floral shower curtain with matching toilet seat cover—it’s on. And if you have a moment when you think you were just shanked, you probably were.
That said, it’s all worth it. Every bitch-slapping, deal-finding, exhilarating moment of finding designer labels without designer price tags. Now back off and unhand that Free People blouse. We’re headed to the register. This is retail therapy at its most thrilling.