¡ASK A MEXICAN!
By Gustavo Arellano
Not Wearing Bean-Colored Glasses
Dear Gabacho: I did answer the question; you just couldn’t handle the question We can easily solve the problems you, I, and activists decry by treating the problems for what they are—economic issues instead of “cultural” issues. All the problems you brought up are endemic to nearly every group of poor people this country has ever hosted, from negritos to chinitos to gabachos, Native Americans, and, yes, Mexicans. And those problems largely disappear once said group move up in class—you don’t see Boston Brahmins addicted to Mountain Dew like hillbillies in West Virginia, do you (but you might see a mick from Southie suffer from the same condition)? Where people like you and that other pendejo you defend go wrong is by insisting on the Mexican part of the social-problem equation, reducing behavioral pathologies to cultural determinants—in language you can understand, ustedes think Mexicans are in a “desperate state” because they’re Mexicans and nothing else. So, sí: you and your ilk deserve all the disparaging in the mundo, pinche pendejos babosos.
Why do Mexicans drag their ass when crossing the street? I have noticed that wherever I go in Orange County, when a Mexican is crossing the street and folks are waiting for them to clear the crosswalk they seem to slow their already slow asses down just because they know the cars have to wait. Is this simply a ploy to piss people off that are in a hurry? Because it’s working. I have also noticed this is a peculiarly Mexican trait, Asians, Blacks, and White folks actually briskly walk across the street when they see someone waiting for them. For a race that seems to be all about respect it seems pretty disrespectful.
Cruising Ambulators Really Rip Off Suckers
Dear CARROS: They’re slowing down not because they want to disrespect commuters but because they don’t want to die. The Federal Highway Administration of America’s The Pedestrian and Bicyclist Highway Safety Problem As It Relates to the Hispanic Population in the United States found that Latinos make up 16.3 percent of pedestrian fatalities, with Mexis making up nearly 65 percent of that stat—both stats about par for Mexi representation in this country, so not exactly an epidemic. While the report did find fault with Latinos importing the traffic laws of their home countries to el Norte, it also reported that these pedestrians found “a lack of respect from drivers” most of the time that led to accidents. So, sí: our raza is all about the respect, but we give it when you’re not running us over.
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