Past Stories
Final Word
Flying somewhere? Don’t forget your knife.
The “friendly skies” have gotten a little stabbier as the Transportation Security Administration considers lifting the ban to allow pocketknives on planes.
To the shock of nobody...
Final Word
Monocles for everyone!
California raked in $4.5 billion over what was expected in state income tax this year, according to state officials. Nearly $2.8 billion arrived on April 17, the third-highest collection day in state hist...
Final Word
Did you feel it? The earth shook.
This week’s Sports Illustrated features a cover story titled, The Gay Athlete. In it, NBA player Jason Collins became the first male professional athlete from a major American sports team to ...
Final Word
Recent articles in The New York Times, Daily Mail and Slate.com have detailed one of the latest parenting trends: a diaper-free style of child-rearing—emphasis on “rear.”
Called “elimination communication,” it allows ...
Final Word
Deep breath, America. Talk about your rough weeks.
Last Friday’s capture of a second bombing suspect related to the bombing of the Boston Marathon capped off one of the most memorably stressful weeks in our nation’s history...
Final Word
Beliebe or Not
It is so easy to hate Justin Bieber. Oh my god, it is easy.
He’s Canadian. He weighs as much as a cocker spaniel. He looks like a young Carol Burnett.
(Wait, I’m not done.)
He dresses…
Final Word
Get in the hole!
Mere days after Tiger Woods regained his status as the No. 1-ranked golfer in the world, Nike released a controversial new ad. It features a goateed Tiger staring down a putt, and the tagline, “Winning takes&...
Final Word
Reward shmeward! So says Riverside Mayor William “Rusty” Bailey.
Mayor Rusty and the City of Riverside are refusing to pay its share of a reward for the capture of deceased cop killer, Christopher Dorner.
In February, Dorne...
Final Word
Pack your bags. We’re going to Mars!
Danish millionaire Bas Lansdorp, founder of the Mars One Project, has promised to put humans on the Red Planet by 2023. Applications to join the Mars mission are open to anyone—no experi...
Final Word
All hail the Commander-in-Chief! Just do it from a half-mile away and from behind a 10-foot armored gate. (Please don’t touch the armored gate.)
That’s the message sixth graders from Waverly, Iowa, were given when they had ...
Final Word
Former Playboy model and former Girls Next Door reality star Holly Madison has given birth to a baby girl, Rainbow Aurora. What’s more surprising: Holly still wanted to name her daughter Rainbow after the drugs wore off.
Alre...
Final Word
Back to work! That’s what Yahoo’s big boss is telling its 14,500 workforce.
Yahoo CEO Marissa Mayer recently banned working from home for hundreds of Yahoo telecommuters. All Yahoo employees have until June 1 to start putti...
Final Word
The future is coming and it’s going to sit on your face.
Google has invented computerized eyewear to video chat, take photos, search the Internet, check weather and get driving directions, according to CNET. Marketed as “Go...
Final Word
The Academy Awards are scheduled for Sunday and odds are your favorite movie won’t win. It probably wasn’t even nominated.
Recent winners for Best Picture have included The Artist, The King’s Speech and Slumdog Millionair...
Final Word
No fair! That’s what Coach Jim Harbaugh is yelling, after his San Francisco 49ers lost the Super Bowl on a controversial last-minute play. Jim Harbaugh—whose team was competing against his older brother, Baltimore Ravens Co...
Final Word
We’re fat. We’re lazy. And we lo-o-ove to smoke.
That’s according to the 2013 Community Health Profile, a report released by the County of Riverside Department of Public Health.
Turns out residents of Riverside County are...
Final Word
Beyon-Say-Can-You-Sing?
Beyoncé reportedly used a “backing track” during her performance of the national anthem at Barack Obama’s recent presidential inauguration . . . I’m starting to suspect Beyoncé might not even...
Final Word
Think you had a rough week?
Notre Dame linebacker Manti Te’o has been labeled everything from a chump to a con artist after his two-year relationship with girlfriend, Lennay Kekua, turned out to be imaginary.
Te’o received ...
Final Word
Is Lance Armstrong a weasely little bastard who had the one ball to actually lie to cancer patients? You bet.
A “no-holds barred” TV interview with cyclist Lance Armstrong was scheduled to air on Thursday, hosted by Oprah W...
Final Word
Get ready to lose all that extra holiday weight…
Flu season is here—about five weeks early. It’s been described as “intense” and “severe” and “the feel-good hit of the summer.” (Actually that last quote might...
Final Word
Ready! Set! Geronimo!
As of Sunday, no deal had been reached in Congress to avoid going over the “fiscal cliff” and that could be a pain in the ass for every American.
I’m no economist. The first time I heard…
Final Word
No figgy pudding for you:
Six former and current postal workers—calling themselves Communities and Postal Workers United—have staged their second hunger strike in the last six months in Washington, D.C. As scheduled, it las...
Final Word
We have a winner!
California has decided to try its luck at Powerball. Our state recently voted to join Powerball, which is played across the country in 42 states. Tickets will begin selling here on April 8 and cost $2…
Final Word
POOF! Like that. It’s over.
Maybe it’s a volcano, an asteroid or a 50-story fire-breathing, smoke monster. But you, your pet hamster and everyone you’ve ever cared about, Googled or flipped off—they’ll be deader than ...
Final Word
Forty-five percent of Americans said they’d rather skip Christmas, according to a recent poll.
Who can blame them? Christmas blows.
The stress, the travel, the traffic, the lines, the malls, the mall Santas, the creepy mall S...
Final Word
We’re leaving—and we’re taking our state with us!
That’s the message some unhappy Americans are sending to the White House. Upset that Barack Obama has been re-elected president, the White House has received petitions f...
Final Word
There’s a hole in my heart—like someone sucked out all the cream filling.
After 82 years, Hostess is going out of business. One of the largest wholesale bakers of breads and snack cakes, Hostess filed for bankruptcy on Frid...
Final Word
Meet the new president, same as the old president. Last Tuesday, 125 million Americans cast their ballots for president and it wasn’t as close as you may think.
Nearly 3 million more people voted for President Obama. And, acc...
